Writing Formula – One Scene to Improve Your Novel

Sunday morning was one of those times when things just come together.  Remember how I had come up with a foolproof formula for generating light bulb ideas?  Well, apparently the cosmos aligned again Sunday morning, as I was able to crank out the turning point in my novel, a brief scene that will lead me down a larger toward a much better story.  The elements needed for this opportune moment are as follows:

  • One bowl of generic honey nut cheerios
  • One and a half cups of Dunkin’ Donuts’ original flavor coffee (with sugar and cream)
  • One banana
  • A good amount of natural light from the west-facing windows
  • Laptop
  • Story open on laptop
  • Remembering the review a writer friend gave on how to make the story better

Combine these elements and Bam!(copyright, Emeril) you’ve got  the perfect setup to write a one-and-a-half-page scene that changes the shape of your novel into something better than it was.

Note: The banana can be substituted for an apple, but not an orange, or anything that requires the removal of a peel to access the fruit itself.  That takes up too much time and kills the formula.  Truth.

Writing Formula – Light Bulb Ideas

Monday night, at about 11:15 pm, while waiting for my wife to get home from Eclipse, I had a few light bulb ideas that should fix the biggest remaining problems with my novel, Alien Nation.  The following is the fool-proof formula for generating light bulb ideas:

  • Two glasses of Phillips Union Original Flavor whiskey
  • One Jack’s pepperoni pizza
  • One hour of watching John Mayer videos on YouTube where he does funny stuff
  • Twenty minutes staring at novel and doing nothing with it
  • One more glass of Phillips Union Original Flavor whiskey
  • Forty seconds thinking about how delicious Phillips Union Original Flavor whiskey is
  • Ten more minutes staring at novel while resting head on table because it got kinda heavy
  • Light bulb idea

Now that I’ve got these light bulb ideas, all I have to do is update the manuscript with them and bing bang boom, we got ourselves a done book.

Should only take a month or two.